Being a police officer can be a hard job. There’s no telling what the day may bring: people yelling at you, throwing stuff at you, shooting at you. They deal with people who are at their worst and who may be having the worst day of their lives. Long hours, low pay, and low resources are all par for the course. Yet they report for duty day in and day out.
Despite the drawbacks, most cops will tell you they’d never want another job, and they all have at least one lively “you’ll never believe this” story.
Today we’ll hear ten of these stories, from bizarre to hilarious, in the officer’s own words. Numbers 3 and 1 just cracked me up!
10. Where’s My Jesus?
Our first officer shared the case of the missing Jesus. “One afternoon, a lady came into the station to report that her red Chrysler Cordoba was stolen from the parking lot of the local grocery store.
Around the same time, a patrol was dispatched to the same store to contact a confused elderly woman.
Turns out the elderly woman (who owned the same make, model, and color of car) had driven off in the other lady’s car and not realized it wasn’t hers until she was about halfway home and noticed her statue of Jesus was missing from the dash. No charges were filed.”
9. Chasing Chewie
This cop told us about his most interesting road stop. “While sitting at one of the longest red lights ever, I looked across the intersection and saw Chewbacca driving the vehicle opposite me.
I did a double take, then looked around to see if anyone else was seeing this. My eyes met those of a middle-aged man in a corvette next to me. and we both laughed before I flipped the lights and tracked Chewie down harder than Boba Fett. I let him off with a warning about the legalities of driving in masks.”
8. She Needed Those Nuggets
This undercover cop recalled an interesting proposition. “While working undercover on a prostitution sting, I was propositioned by a “lady of the night”. We went back and forth, haggling on what the price of her services would be until she finally agreed to perform the act for $25 and some Chicken McNuggets. It was certainly one of the more unique pricing structures I’d heard.” Speaking of unique, wait until you read number 6!
7. Watch Out For Those Raccoons
Our next officer’s story is a little wild. “One of our rookies got sent out to pick up a large raccoon lying dead at the side of the road. Per department policy, she loaded the carcass up in a large trash bag and took it to the station for storage in a freezer until animal control could come pick it up for disposal.
Several days later, the animal control officer opened up the freezer to find the interior completely destroyed. Turns out the raccoon hadn’t been dead after all, just stunned, and trashed the freezer trying to escape.”
6. Just Cheese Man
Sometimes the rookies just can’t catch a break, as our next cop’s story demonstrates. “I was still a rookie on the force when I pulled over a Hispanic guy for a broken taillight. He didn’t speak English well and was acting quite strange, so I started searching him.
When I found a bag of white powder in his pocket my heart started pounding, because it would’ve been my first big bust. The guy starts freaking out, and says “QUESO! QUESO! QUESO!” Now I don’t speak Spanish, but I do know what queso is, so I opened the bag and sniffed the contents. Turns out it’s full of powdered parmesan cheese.
I handed him back the bag and told him to get his taillight fixed.”