Being in love is great, but it’s also hard work. Any guy who has been in a major relationship knows that it’s not always smooth sailing. Sometimes a big fight happens that goes on for what feels like an eternity simply because both sides refuse to admit they are wrong.
But while it doesn’t seem like it, fighting is actually pretty healthy. However, it’s also possible that the fight could get out of control, and that’s when the relationship can go haywire.
However, if you follow these 10 guaranteed tips to help you end a fight with your GF, you’ll be back in each other’s arms in no time. You’ll wonder how you never thought of number 5.
10. Try Listening – Really Listening
Every story has two sides, and the same goes for fights. While it is in our nature to always think we are right, it’s possible that we could be wrong. That’s why it is important to really listen to your partner by paraphrasing what they say to prevent any misconceptions, or by doing a perception check. This will show that you are trying to understand where your partner is coming from and that you actually understand. Use this with number 8, and you’ll be golden.
9. Don’t Be So Negative
One of our most natural responses to when someone gets angry at us is to get angry right back. But have you heard the phrase “two wrongs don’t make a right?” The same goes for fights with your girlfriend. So instead of responding to her anger with more anger, try balancing the anger out with some positive energy.
8. Walk In Her Shoes
One way to understand where your girlfriend is coming from is to try walking in her shoes. In other words, find a way to look at things from her point of view. Doing so will give you clarity on how she feels and may make you realize that perhaps you were the one who was wrong.
7. Always And Never
One way in which fights get started is when one person decides to use the words “always” or never, followed by something they wish to change about their partner. For example, perhaps you tell your GF that she is always texting her friends when you are together. However, this makes people get really defensive, so if you want to avoid a fight, avoid using “always” and “never.” If you forget this step, you may have to use number 6.
6. It’s Time To Cool Off
If things are getting too heated and you two just can’t seem to reach any type of agreement, perhaps it’s time to go out and get some air. Take a moment to separate and catch a few breaths, then come back after you have cooled down and really thought things through. Having a clear head goes a long way in crushing a fight.
5. Don’t Show Contempt For Your GF
One of the worst things you can do is to show contempt towards your girlfriend during a fight. This means that you are being overly rude or sarcastic just for the sake of being mean. Being sarcastic avoids actually talking, and could eventually lead to a break-up. But if you think being sarcastic is bad, you should also avoid number 2.
4. Don’t Get So Defensive
When fights happen, we always want to make sure we get the upper hand, but that’s not always the best course of action. Getting defensive, like many others on this list prevents true communication from happening, and will stop a relationship cold. So instead of thinking you are being attacked, really try and understand where they are coming from.
3. Pick Your Battles
When someone starts a fight, it sometimes brings up other issues that the couple is having at the time. But there is a time and a place for everything, so you have to know when to pick your battles. So if the fight is about the dishes, is it really smart to bring up how she leaves her towels everywhere?
2. Avoid The Blame Game
When confronted, it’s easy to try and pass the blame to your partner. For example, if she thinks you flirt too much, your first instinct might be to blame he for being jealous. But what that really does is put your girlfriend on the defensive, so don’t be so quick to blame your GF for the wrong things that you do.
1. Don’t Beat Around The Bush
We’ve talked a lot about being non-confrontational, but sometimes avoiding the problem or beating around the bush can be just as bad. Not getting to the point can lead to increased frustration, so the best thing you can do is be as direct as possible without being rude or sarcastic.
If you haven’t been paying attention to what has been said in these tips, basically it all boils down to listening. Listening to your partner will help you see where they are coming from and can keep tensions from rising to troubling levels. Also, try and choose your words very carefully and definitely don’t be rude or sarcastic. Doing so will end any fight, and will get you and your GF on your way to the best part: making up.
Is there a tip that we missed that you would like to mention? If so, place it in the comments below.