Vaginas rule the world. They can make the bold men blush and the timid men crush. Society has led us to believe the female genitalia is something that should be kept away hidden inside a locked box. Boys are typically separated from the girls during sexual education and are forced to learn about these amazing gateways to human life. We are here to pull back the veil of the vagina and discuss it in all of its glory.
Even though each woman’s “lady parts” are as different as unique snowflakes, a waxing specialist named “Mel” says that when it comes down to it, there are really only 5 major types of vaginas in the world.
They are …
5. The “Ms. Curtains”
Women who fall under the “Ms. Curtains” category have a labia minora which extends beyond the labia majora. The layman will refer to them as “beef curtains.” Some are more noticeable than others but this is the most common type of vagina Mel comes across and often appears combined with the other types featured on this list.
Unfortunately, a lot of women are embarrassed, some are downright depressed when they discover they have “Ms. Curtains” and it’s quite unfortunate. If only they realized they are in the labia “majority” of women on Earth. Head over to #4 to find out what’s going on when your vagina is horseshoe-shaped.
4. The “Ms. Horseshoe”
Mel’s name for this is derived from the horseshoe shape of this particular vagina. It appears when the vaginal opening is spread a little bit wider at the top and exposes the labia minora and closes off towards the bottom.The labia minora will not usually extend beyond the labia majora.
Think of it as a valuable treasure symbolizing good luck and fortune. Wish yourself good fortunes and be thankful you are a beautiful woman in outstanding health.
But what if the vagina is shaped like a beautiful blooming flower? Head over to #3 to find out all about it!
3. The “Ms. Tulip”
Many lady parts have been described as flowers. Even a few flowers closely resemble vaginas (Georgia O’Keeffe anyone? Yes, we’re cultured).
The “Ms. Tulip” vagina resembles a flower bud about to bloom on a perfect Spring evening. It happens when the labia minora is exposed a little along the labia majora. It is different from the “Ms. Curtains” vagina because the labia minora is exposed but also slightly contained.
Mel says the two are quite similar, but one is more pronounced than the other.
Do you want to know what it is called when the labia minora seems to have disappeared? Mosey on over to #2 to find out.
2. The “Ms. Barbie”
If you ever played with the Mattel Barbie dolls when you were a child then you have undoubtedly seen one of them naked. The surface of the crotch is so smooth because Mattel was smart enough not to give their dolls genitalia. Keep this in mind when picturing the “Ms. Barbie” vagina.
These women have a labia majora that completely covers the labia minora and everything pushes up to the pelvic bone. Mel says this is what most people picture when they think of vaginas. It is actually the least common. Finally, we’ll go over Ms. Puffs in #1.
1. The “Ms. Puffs”
You might be thinking this model of vagina got its name from the Spongebob character, but you would be wrong. “Ms. Puffs” looks very similar to the Ms. Barbie, but the lips usually rest a lot lower and can either puff up and appear really full or thin down and look really loose… like a puffer fish.
Mel says that most people believe this effect occurs depending on the age or weight of the lady, but there has been no scientific study on this matter. Regardless of the size and shape of your reproductive organs, they are all fascinating, beautiful, and mysterious in their own way.